Monday, November 3, 2008

Raw: New Retro

The 800th Monday Night Raw was full of retrospective clips, featuring our favorites from 1993 to today. The first episode had Vince McMahon and Macho Man Randy Savage announcing, Bobby Heenan trying to get in the building and Shawn Michaels wrestling.

Shawn Michaels is still wrestling, and, no, boys and girls, he is not yet 50. After doing their duty to get verbal and visual revenge on the Miz and Morrison pre-match, DX allowed the younger team to dominate for a little bit, including a sweet chin music by Morrison on Triple H followed by a “suck it” taunt. However, it was DX who was the victor, with Triple H pinning the Miz after a pedigree.

The Undertaker also had match in the first and 800th episode of Raw. In the latter, he got to face a pretentious JBL.

The stretch limo carrying Shane and Stephanie McMahon (and what sounded like a small child) did arrive at the arena, but Stephanie deferred to her brother to take care of business.
Before Shane could even say what he had come to Raw to do, GM Mike Adamle met him and Randy Orton in the ring.

“This job corrupts, and I don’t want to let that happen to me,” Adamle said before resigning from his position as general manager of Raw.

After Adamle left the ring to the sound of rousing cheers, Shane explained he found out Orton had been cleared to compete for weeks, and decided to give Orton a match against CM Punk.

Adamle later confronted Stephanie and told her she was the reason he resigned—he was apparently selected by Shane to be GM, and Stephanie has reversed every decision he’s made. I smell an epic McMahon battle to be concluded at Survivor Series…

In related news, Shane announced the World Heavyweight Championship would be defended against John Cena at Survivor Series.

Also, there was a dancing interlude in the ring featuring Kung Fu Naki, Hornswoggle, Boogieman, Goldust, Dusty Rhodes, Sgt. Slaughter, Hacksaw Jim Duggan, Lillian Garcia and Michael Cole, interrupted by Ron Simmons’ “Damn!”

Raw Results (11/3):
The Hardys v. MVP and The Brian Kendrick, Matt pins MVP
Battle Royal for Intercontinental Championship Match next week (DiBiase eliminated Manu and Rhodes), William Regal wins by eliminating Ted DiBiase
Vladimir Kozlov v. Bret “The Hitman” Haas (Charlie Haas dressed up as Bret Hart) Kozlov pins Haas
16-Diva Tag Match, Beth Phoenix pins Mae Young
CM Punk v. Randy Orton, Orton DQ’d when DiBiase interferes, Orton kicks DiBiase’s head
Undertaker v. JBL, JBL counted out, Taker wins (HBK tosses JBL back in ring so Taker can finish him off with tombstone)
Kane and Mark Henry v. Rey Mysterio and Kofi Kingston, Henry pins Kingston
World Heavyweight Championship Steel Cage Match Chris Jericho v. Champ Batista, Jericho climbs out of the cage and wins championship


Key WWE injuries/absences:
John Cena: herniated disc in neck, expected to return Nov. 23 at Survivor Series
Evan Bourne: dislocated ankle and torn deltoid ligament, will be re-evaluated later this week
Edge: in Hell (or Florida, promoting SD on My Network TV)
Mr. Kennedy: dislocated shoulder early August, return unknown
Melina: broken ankle, expected to return late November/early December

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